Holly’s Do’s and Don’ts for Disneyland

Everyone loves Disneyland until you actually get there. Disneyland is in the business of destroying every adult’s dream of reliving their childhood by providing a few acres filled with screaming children and urine-soaked, measles-infected seating from which to view scenes of animatronic pirates chasing and ostensibly sexually assaulting animatronic women. And you get all this for the price of a $90 ticket.